Monday, June 18, 2012


Your beliefs don't make you a better person...
your behavior does.

What is it about being a better person that few truly aspire to?  Why do most settle for who they are, and if others don't like it, it is too darn bad?  I make a conscious effort to think every day of my life how can I be better.  What can I do for others that will make them feel better about themselves.  Then I come face to face with a person I have never laid eyes on, a person I do not know, a person who has taken it upon herself to judge me and write horrific things about me to someone else I don't know. 

Guess I don't have to tell you that life and people get complicated, exhausting, depleting, annoying, aggravating, and just plain unreasonable.  But I wish someone would tell me why someone takes it upon themselves to say things about you that they know absolutely nothing about in a public forum.  Granted it was a mistake, posted to a group, not just the one individual she had intended it to go to.  Flags went up.  Massive apologizes came immediately from dozens and dozens apologizing for her, but her vitriolic, most hurtful words still stung and dug deep.  Funny and odd how I seem to have been attacked, because I had reached out for help and received venom in return. 

Why do people do this?  Why do they intentionally gossip and say things about others of which they know nothing. Isn't there something about 'walking in your shoes?" The apologizes from others helped to some degree, but the questions remain as to what makes people so unbearably insufferable and vindictive and full of hate for someone they have never laid eyes on.  Her apology for hitting the send button 'to all' as opposed to one person was simply she would apologize but really didn't mean it. So basically why bother. She has to live with her venom, not I.

I find it interesting, and somewhat ironic, that it came the day after my post MOANING AND GROANING.  People like this are tiring and 'full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.'  Their attempts at battering, belittling, and just plain being mean do nothing to others, but let you know who they are.  I could go on but she deserves no further discussion. 

What is important is moving on to your happiest life possible.  It takes great strength to let go of the ugly people and their odious and vile words, actions and deeds, for in the end they are the ones who will be hurt, not you.  We learn to accept the things we cannot change, and come to realize that letting go can be a beginning.  Part of being a winner and the best person you can be is knowing when to say enough is enough. And let go and move on.

"You have it easily in your power to increase the sum total of this world's happiness now!  How?  By giving a few words of sincere appreciation to someone who is lonely or discouraged.  Perhaps you will forget tomorrow the kind words you say today, but the recipient may cherish them over a lifetime." ~Dale Carnegie

"If you wish to experience peace, provide peace for another. If you wish to know that you are safe, cause another to know that they are safe. If you wish to better understand seemingly incomprehensible things, help another to better understand. If you wish to heal your own sadness or anger, seek to heal the sadness or anger of another." Author Unknown

Charles Dickens wrote, "Life is made of ever so many partings welded together."  Some we are eager to see vanish and some we endure with great sorrow.  But to me it is in the welding together that we discover who we are and just what we are made of. 

As a friend wrote, "Did you know the people who exhibit the most kindness are the first to get mistreated?"  Well she couldn't have been more right in this case and in others of late. I have ceased trying to figure it out, it only gives them credibility.  So no more. 

So this Monday begins with more partings welded together in my life.  People can be cruel, unforgiving, hurtful and judgmental, but I will never allow anyone to steal my joy or throw me off balance or off course. Or I will give it my best shot!

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